I'm drive I can fine osifer
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My ass is underappreciated
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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