So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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