I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
im holly from the hills drunk
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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