i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
