i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
