your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
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