You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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