escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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