That's when you crack a 10am beer
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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