literally had 100 drinks last night.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
