Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i think my tv is drunk
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
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