After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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