i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I have aggressive nipples.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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