so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I think people are normalizing furries
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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