You're my little dorito
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
