Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
