I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Vodka?
Forever.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
