Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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