ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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