I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize