Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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