I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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