there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
