i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Fuck appropriateness.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize