Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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