I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
and you fell through a lawn chair
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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