He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
