...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
