Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
