She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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