It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
You dont lie about slip and slides
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
