i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
