And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
