do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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