So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Houston, we have a blender
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
