This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
