You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize