you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
