i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Mom said you looked used
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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