how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
