He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
