My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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