If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he shaved USA in his pubs
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
