dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
