id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm really busy with my period
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