I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
