Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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