you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize