OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
