Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize